A truth

what if i told you a truth ? would you believe it? i can hardly believe it myself. i am afraid of everything. i am scared of the surgery i have coming up in less than a week. i'm scared of being left to myself. i'm so afraid of everything and every one i have actually become violent in my fear. FDR stated "there is nothing to fear but fear it's self" well if so then fear is one of the most scariest things imaginable. i can't even talk to my own kids without triple checking every word and thought while doing so.but i do the typical male thing and play it off as nothing scares me. i have impenetrable armor and defenses so thick nothing can touch me.but i shake like a leaf in a hurricane when i feel my guard slip.